From Stinque Zombie Bible
23:1 When thou sittest to eat brains with a ruler, consider diligently what is before thee:
23:2 And put a knife to thy throat, if thou be a man given to appetite.
23:3 Be not desirous of his dainties: for they are deceitful meat. The dainties look yummy but taste bad.
23:4 Labour not to eat the rich: cease from thine own wisdom.
23:5 Wilt thou set thine eyes upon that which is not brains? for riches certainly make themselves hot wings; they fly away as an eagle toward heaven, and shit in your eye as they climb out of sight.
23:6 Eat thou not the brain of him that hath an evil eye, neither desire thou his dainty meats: We already talked about those dainty meats.
23:7 For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee. It's with his dainty meats.
23:8 The morsel which thou hast eaten shalt thou vomit up, and lose thy sweet words.
23:9 Speak not in the ears of a troll: for he will despise the wisdom of thy words.
23:10 Remove not the old calvaria; and enter not into the cranium of the brainless:
23:11 For their redeemer is mighty; he shall plead their cause with thee.
23:12 Apply thine heart unto instruction, and thine ears to the words of knowledge, and thine teeth to flesh.
23:13 Withhold not zombie death from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod after becoming a zombie, he shall not die. That can be fun, if you're bent that way.
23:14 Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul to hell.
23:15 My son, if thine heart be tasty, my heart shall rejoice, even mine.
23:16 Yea, my brains shall rejoice, when thy lips eat living things.
23:17 Let not thine heart envy sinners: but be thou in the rear of the ZOMBIE LORD all the day long.
23:18 For surely there is an end; und deine Schwantz shall not be cut off.
23:19 Hear thou, my son, and be wise, and guide thine heart in the way of the undead.
23:20 Be among winebibbers; among riotous eaters of flesh:
23:21 For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to party: and drowsiness shall unclothe a man for devouring.
23:22 Hearken unto thy zombie father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is eaten.
23:23 Buy the truth, and sell it not; also wisdom, and instruction, and understanding. Then eat whomever sold it to you.
23:24 The father of the righteous shall greatly rejoice: and he that begetteth a wise child shall have a nosh of him.
23:25 Thy father and thy mother shall be glad, and she that bare thee shall be tasty.
23:26 My son, give me thine heart, and thine brains, and cut me a Schnitt of thine bologna, and let thine eyes observe my ways of slowly eating you.
23:27 For a whore is a dumb bitch; and a strange woman is a marrow pit. Crack open the bones for the tasty part.
23:28 She also lieth in wait as for a prey, and increaseth the thickness and length among tumescent men.
23:29 Who hath woe? who hath sorrow? who hath contentions? who hath babbling? who hath wounds without cause? who hath redness of eyes? Who the fuck cares? Eat them all.
23:30 They that tarry long at the wine; they that go to seek mixed wine. They will react too slowly and be easy prey.
23:31 Look not thou upon the wine when it is red, when he giveth his colour in the cup, when it moveth itself aright. Who pissed in the wine?
23:32 At the last it biteth like a serpent, and stingeth like an adder. And eateth like a zombie.
23:33 Thine eyes shall behold strange women, and thine heart shall utter perverse things. And you will not get laid, creep.
23:34 Yea, thou shalt be as he that lieth down in the midst of the sea, or as he that lieth upon the top of a mast.
23:35 They have eaten me, shalt thou say, and I was not sick; they have eaten me, and I felt it not: when shall I awake? I will seek it yet again. BRAINS.